Why I Love Interim Place

This weekend, Interim Place will be holding its inaugural “Steps to End Violence Against Women” walk.  In my capacity as a board member, I was asked to prepare some opening remarks for the walk and sat down to give some thought as to what I would want to say about Interim Place.  In those quiet moments, I was overcome with thoughts of this incredible organization, but I only have about 30 seconds to speak on Sunday, so thought I would share with you the full version of what I want to say about Interim Place and its work with women experiencing violence and their children.

I didn’t know much when I started working with Interim Place.  I mean, I knew things, but only 2 ½ years later can I look back with a clear understanding of so many things that I was in many ways ignorant about when I walked through the doors.  I’ve learned, for example, that violence is about power more than anger.  I’ve learned that macro political and economic decisions we make impact people (and, specifically at Interim Place, women) in ways that many of us don’t think about when we participate in politics and economics.  I’ve learned that I have many, many privileges, and an undeniable responsibility to think about what I do with my privilege.  So, I love Interim Place in how it challenges my thinking and keeps the realities and experiences of women - and particularly marginalized women - on our community agenda when we might otherwise not be thinking about them.

I love Interim Place because, in the way that I’ve experienced this organization, its doors have a “Welcome Home” sign on it that never gets taken down.  In one of my first blog posts, I posted a video in which Patrick Stewart conveyed his experience growing up in a violent home and I was broken at the moment I heard him say, “We had nowhere to go”.  Of all the challenges that violence and abuse raise, I am always most affected by the idea that women and children in that situation may feel that there is no alternative...there is no way to escape it.  I LOVE that not only is Interim Place a never-closing door for women, but that when women and children come through the door, they are welcomed in a way that endlessly strives to make them feel at home.  Not just a place to go, but a place to go home.

Finally, I love the women of Interim Place.  Interim Place is run by an exceptional management team, staffed by women that commit themselves to frontline work in crisis situations every day, supported by a passionate group of volunteers, governed by a board of directors that I am incredibly proud to be a part of, and visited by some of the most courageous women you could ever hope to meet.  From the first moment I walked up the steps to Interim Place, I have experienced an energy there that is fueled by commitment, passion, social justice, and – yes – love.

It’s no stretch, then, to imagine what drives me to get out on the road to run in support of Interim Place.  I remember arriving to a meeting one night when a woman and her children were exiting a cab to go to the shelter.  My initial reaction was one of sadness and despair for the journey they were facing, until I realized they were entering a space that would welcome them home, keep them safe, and help them to heal.  A marathon doesn’t seem far enough to run in support of that work, and that hope.  This is why I also continue to unabashedly ask you to support the work of Interim Place through a donation to Run Strong.  Every donation made goes directly to support Interim Place’s programs and services.

Thank you for continuing to follow this journey in support of so many other journeys.  And thanks for running with me.

(If you would like to make a donation, please click the link below).  Thank you, thank you!



(Also, if you would like to participate in the Steps to End Violence Against Women Walk, please visit the website at http://stepstoendviolenceagainstwomen.weebly.com/index.html.)

What's in My Noodle

A few things to start off this week:

Thank You

I want to take an opportunity to say a special thank you to the Interim Place Board of Directors this week. This is an absolutely amazing group of women (past and present) that I am so proud to be a part of. Every time I walk into a meeting that involves the board, someone takes the time to ask how my training is going, and the support these women have shown this initiative has been a great inspiration. Thank you for your dedication to the work of Interim Place and for demonstrating all the amazing qualities and perspectives that women bring to leadership roles.

I also want to thank the incredible people I’ve come across on my training route. From the neighbours and other runners/cyclists out on my route that seem to always take a minute to cheer me on, to the drivers that move to the other side of the road to give me enough space, I’ve witnessed so much generosity of spirit while out training and some days it’s what keeps me going. Thank you!!

Training Update

So, I had moved up to 16 and then 19 km training runs, but felt like I had hit a wall doing the 19 km distance. I’m not sure if it’s been adjusting to the heat or what’s going on, but I had major struggles with my 19k run. So, I consulted with my running mentor, Mike, and he suggested that I dial it back to 16 for a week or 2 and then try again. I’ve been doing 16 km for 3 weeks now and have been struggling to take on 19k again. After my 16k this week, my daughter Hannah asked, “How far did you go, mom?”. “16k”, I told her. She asked why I hadn’t increased my distance again and I admitted that I thought I might still struggle with the increased distance. She said, “Pull it together, mom, it’s only another 3K”. From the mouths of babes…so next Tuesday, I’ll be attempting 19k.

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Okay, so in one of my first posts, I said that I would eventually post more about the psychology of running, but because I’m among friends, I feel like I should admit that the only running psychology that I’ve ever studied is my own and, well, I wouldn’t say I’m representative of a broad population of runners.  So, I’m going to compromise and let you in on what goes on in my noodle when I’m out on the road.  This week’s blog is a sample of the honest-to-goodness things I have said to myself while training.  True story…I’ve actually thought each of these things at least once:

-Hi there, pain.  Nice to see you.  Thanks for running with me.  (I got this how-to-stay-happy-while-wanting-to-collapse ditty from the Non-Runner’s Marathon Trainer)

-Well, at least I’m at zero risk of getting a ticket.  (While passing the 60 km/hr speed limit sign)

-I’m counting, what, like 450 clouds in the sky right now.  And not one of you can float your fluffy selves in front of the massive ball of burning gas currently searing the top of my head?

-Ignore the squashed animal on the side of the road…just ignore it…pretend it isn’t there…forget it, I’m crossing to the other side.

-Interesting choice I made doing this run at high noon in the middle of July.

-Taylor Swift, you are so right.  Today WAS a fairytale!

-How much further than this is a marathon?! (Or there are multiple variations of this, e.g.:) If I ran from here to Copps Coliseum would that be equal to a marathon? (or) If I added up all the times I’ve walked to work in the past 10 years, would that be equal to a marathon?

-Thank you, God, for the side of the hill that goes down….and for the Freezie I’ll enjoy when this is over.

-Here comes a pack of 20 super fit cyclists, gliding quickly and effortlessly straight towards me in their slick racing gear.  This definitely isn’t going to be awkward.

-Wonder what the chances are that Eric and the girls will swing by in the car in the next 45 minutes.

-Giggle.  Giggle.  (Every time I pass the deer crossing sign on Centre Rd. where someone has drawn a red ball on the deer’s nose)

-(As I approach my turn-around point) 50 metres…40 metres…30 metres…20 metres…10 metres…Can I get an AMEN…I’m now running home!!!!

-Terry Fox ran a marathon everyday while battling cancer and on a prosthetic leg.  Quit your complaining, Corrie, and do this.

-Oh, no you didn’t!  (To a mosquito I nabbed that was depleting my much-needed blood supply)

-Sure hope I make it home in time for the (insert event here).  (e.g., conference call/dentist appointment/Mentalist).

-Sure hope people donate to Interim Place (this is actually more of a shameless plug…if you haven’t yet donated, please consider supporting Interim Place’s work with women that have experienced violence and their children by clicking on the link below )



-The iPhone is the greatest invention the world has ever known. Not only can I listen to my playlist while training, but if I experience heart failure/get attacked by a coyote, I can call for immediate help.

-I am so grateful for my legs.

-I wonder if any of the random strangers that live along this stretch of road would mind if I borrow their hose.

-Someday I hope to complete one of these runs in a time that I’d be proud to post on Facebook.

-(And, when the going gets really tough, I think of this quote)

Thanks for running with me!!

4 Days...2 Incredible Life Moments

Corrie’s note: When I first wrote this blog, I had been deeply affected by two amazing happenings. However, over the past weeks I’ve also been deeply moved by – and want to acknowledge – the incredible generosity of those who have made recent donations to Run Strong.  As I’ve said before, the real success of this initiative is if there is if there is even a small increase in the capacity to meet the needs of women and children fleeing abuse.  I am so very grateful for the donations that have been made and for the generous hearts behind those gifts.  Thank you, thank you.

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On March 20, 2012 at 6:20 Toronto time, I boarded a plane bound for Rome, Italy.  It was any day for most people around me...life and routine as usual.  However, that day and time will probably stick with me for the rest of my life because in that moment I knew some of the worst anxiety I have ever known in my life.

To say I am not a good flyer is an understatement.  From the time I was very young (7 or 8 years old as I recall), I have had recurrent dreams about plane crashes...not just yearly or monthly, but at least once or twice a week.  Applying my exceptional psychic abilities (and – let’s be honest – largely influenced by the movie La Bamba), I decided that this was my sub-conscious’ way of giving me a heads-up on how things were going to end for me.  You can well imagine, then, what the moment of saying good-bye to my family to go on a trip looks like.

While I have flown several times and absolutely love to travel and experience new places, I had all but resolved myself to the fact that I would never have it in me to fly overseas.  I wanted so desperately to go to Europe – among other reasons, to see places that my family immigrated from – but did not think I could bring myself to get on a plane that would wander out over ocean nothingness...miles from any safe airport to land at in the event of an emergency.  When the opportunity to go to Rome came up, I knew that I was going to have to face my worst fears if I was going to go...and at 6:20 on March 20, 2012, I did just that.

I had always dreamed of what it would be like to go to Europe (I mean, literally...in between plane crash visions, I would dream of sightseeing at Buckingham Palace).  When the plane took off, I started counting the 530 minutes until we would be on land again.  I watched the plane’s progress on the digital map and I’m pretty sure let out an audible groan when the little moving plane icon headed out over the Atlantic. But then, the most amazing thing happened...

At around 1:00 a.m. Toronto time, after flying in pitch blackness for 5 hours, I could see a hint of blue out the plane window...a hint that became a gush of blue and started to spread across the sky.  In my exhausted, anxious state, I let out a massive, cathartic, glorious exhale as I realized that I was now flying into a European dawn...while my family, friends, and sweet girls were tucked in their beds fast asleep, morning was breaking in southern Europe and I had safely made it to the other side of the Atlantic.  For the rest of my life, I will never forget that exact moment.  I realized what a massive, imposing barrier fear is and that the rewards can be incredible if we face it head-on and become determined to overcome it.  I thought of my marathon and wanted to share the exact moment with you as a reminder that amazing things can happen when we refuse to let fear win.  Here is that moment in pictures:

Dawn breaks in Europe: A moment I'll never forget.

Moments later, my breath was taken away as we flew over the French Alps.  I simply couldn't believe I was there.

I arrived back from Rome on March 27th at approximately 2:30 p.m. Toronto time.  When I landed, I let everyone on Facebook know that I had survived the traumatic journey.  A number of people posted comments saying how glad they were that I was home safe, but one post stood out: as I was sitting on the tarmac exhausted and elated, my friend Mike Herzog posted, “Time for a run!!”

Now, you may recall that I mentioned Mike in a previous blog post and that – as a great supporter of Run Strong  – Mike was a previous guest blogger, but on March 17th – 3 days before I left for my trip – Mike did something that has changed my entire approach to this marathon: of his own huge-heartedness and volition, he developed a training plan for me based on where I was starting from, my typical speed, and my goals for the race.  And then he challenged me (and has been ever since) to stick to it.

Before Mike sent me the training plan, I was loosely following the “Non-Runner’s Marathon Trainer”...and praying a lot that I could do this.  When Mike sent me the plan, he (as an accomplished endurance athlete) basically said to me, “Not only can you do this, but you need to think bigger because you can run faster than you are running.  It is, however, going to take consistent and diligent training.”

Mike’s guidance has changed everything about my approach.  I am now running faster and smarter and I feel significantly more accountable for my training.  It’s also changed how I think about myself.  He has told me over and over again, “You can achieve incredible results: you just have to be whole-heartedly committed to it.”  To know that I am not limited by where I am at today has set me free to imagine not only that I can finish but that I can become a strong, consistent runner even beyond my marathon.  By extension, I’ve learned that we can all become our best selves when we do it with passion and commitment.  Thank you, Mike, for the incredible impact you've had.

No doubt, March was an amazing month for me.  2 incredible experiences taught me to think beyond my own perceived limits and that courage and persistence can change everything.  To everyone reading this, I wish you safe travels, passionate pursuit of your goals, and strong, brave running.

Thanks for running with me.


Please consider supporting Interim Place with a donation through Run Strong.  100% of proceeds will go to Interim Place's programs and services for women fleeing violence and their children.  You can make a donation by clicking on the button below or email me at corrie@run-strong.ca if you'd like to donate offline. Thanks for your support!!

Thoughts on Our Village

One of the great learnings for me since I have been working with Interim Place has been to come to a greater understanding of the rich diversity of our communities and, no less, the remarkable diversity of people around our world.  I am developing a keen understanding that the lens I see the world through is formed by the complex intersection of my culture, background, religious beliefs, race, gender, and life experiences, among other things.   That intersection is unique to me, as yours is to you.  Our great challenge is to build peace and decrease violence in a way that not only respects, but appreciates, and celebrates that diversity.

This is why we speak particularly about violence against women.  Violence shows its face in (too) many forms and against both genders around our globe, and I have learned that to understand its root causes and effectively address them, we have to understand how violence is perpetrated and experienced in a multitude of unique situations and circumstances: there is no “one-size-fits-all” approach to eliminating violence.

To eliminate violence against women is not to deny the existence of violence against or among men.  I would love for humanity to be able to say that non-violence and peaceful conflict resolution is a fundamental characteristic of our entire species.  Yet to address issues of women abuse, there is undeniably a need to look at the unique ways that violence is perpetrated against women and to address those issues directly.  It is to be honest about the role that power plays in violence.  It is to understand that women experiencing violence may also face poverty, employment, housing, mental health, immigration, addiction and other issues that are related to or affected by their experiences as women.  Sometimes these additional issues affect whether women will continue to live with the violence.

This realization was how I came to be involved with Interim Place: many times while up in the middle of the night with my newborn baby girls or in the stress of the most difficult days as a mom, I wondered how I would cope if I had to deal with all of these mom stresses while also fearing for the safety of myself and my children. Would I have the means to provide an alternative for my family (particularly having been out of the work force while on almost consecutive maternity leaves)?  Who would care for my children while I had to work?  How secure would my employment be if I had to be absent to care for a child that was sick or had special needs?  Where would we live? How would I know what my legal rights would be as a mom?  Could I afford a lawyer to tell me?  What if, in addition to these pieces, I was living with a disability?  I realized that women in violent situations have painstaking decisions to make and that we can’t understand women’s experience with violence in isolation of all of these considerations.

Through the amazing women working at and with Interim Place, I continue to learn and think about these pieces daily.  My challenge to everyone reading this is to consider these pieces the next time you find yourself generalizing about people, their experiences, or – in particular – about women experiencing violence.  Our backgrounds and experiences are mind-bogglingly unique, so our analysis on how to address critical issues such as abuse has to reflect that, including what it uniquely means to experience violence as a woman.

To close off this week, I want to share a piece that always gives me perspective and reminds me that my individual experiences are not global experiences.  While we share a great common humanity that binds us, the world is infinitely rich in the diversity of the people that live in our incredible global village.  It’s a description of how the world would look if it was a village of 100 people.

If the world were a village of 100 people:

• 61 would be Asian ; 14 would be African; 11 would be European; 8 would come from South America, Central America (including Mexico), and the Caribbean; 5 would be from Canada and the United States; 1 would be from Oceania
• 50 would be women; 50 would be men
• 47 villagers would live in an urban area
• 12 villagers would have a disability
• 43 villagers would not have basic sanitation
• 33 villagers would not have access to a safe water supply
• 20 people would own 75% of the wealth of the entire village
• 50 villagers would be malnourished
• 16 villagers would not be able to read or write
• Only 8 villagers would have an internet connection
• 21 people would live on US $1.25 per day or less

In all of its diversity and with all of its challenges, it really is an awesome world...with lots of work to be done.

Thanks for running with me.


Please consider supporting Interim Place with a donation through Run Strong.  100% of proceeds will go to Interim Place's programs and services for women fleeing violence and their children.  You can make a donation by clicking on the button below or email me at corrie@run-strong.ca if you'd like to donate offline. Thanks for your support!!

Inspire the Inspirer by Guest Blogger Scott Palko

It's once again time to take a break from my musings to hear from this week's guest blogger.  He's the owner of CCI Studios (a corporate sponsor of Run Strong and the creators of the Run Strong website) and an amazing soul that will be joining me in my marathon quest in October.   He has been one of my most committed and enthusiastic supporters in this journey and he also happens to be my brother...not to mention (get ready for my unapologetic sister brag), he was recently named Sarnia's Citizen of the Year!  This week, I asked the amazing Scott Palko to send me his thoughts on why he - and CCI - are supporting Run Strong.  Here's what he had to say (thanks for running with me!):

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Corrie is a human goldfish.  She can go through her packed day of being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, friend, entrepreneur and runner and have the world cave in.  Yet, like clockwork, tomorrow’s morning hits and she is the reverse-Cinderella.  The resetting of the clock resets her dedication to change and she forgets the bad from the day before like it did not happen.  The world can be great, she can make it that way – and the glass shoe will fit perfectly.  Many people say they live this way, but few actually do it – C Dawg is one of them.

So, when I have my bad days and I begin to struggle with whether or not I can actually change the world, I am inspired by this trait of perseverance in my sister.  I am motivated by her bottomless well of belief in the good that we, as individuals, can bring about.  I am in awe of her actions in the face of societal contempt and her selflessness in a world of narcissism.  At the same time, I am reminded that simply thinking highly of her is not enough – I must act.  I must help inspire the inspirers by actively embracing their efforts.

When people ask why I am running this marathon with her and why CCI Studios supports Run Strong – it is not just because of the great cause Run Strong supports, it is because when someone dedicates themselves, day-after-day to doing good – they need to know they are doing it.  They need to know that their actions are inspiring other people and the two hands they have attached to them are working toward building a brighter future for everyone around them.  They need to know that their unrelenting faith in human beings and unabashed concern for the inhabitants of our world – the majority of whom they will never meet – IS making a difference.  The world IS changing because of their efforts – and their works are, well…working.

So, that is my reason for running this marathon with my sister and running this race of change with all of you.  We need to celebrate and support those who are making a difference.  It’s not enough to assume these individuals will just keeping doing good – we need to tie up our shoes, climb to the mountaintop and exclaim “Thank you.  You have changed my world, which has, in turn, changed our world”.  Today, it is my sister Corrie’s marathon.  Tomorrow it may be my sister Marlo or my brother Joe or my parents or anyone of you who need to know your actions are making a difference.  To that end, your call should be answered because you are making a difference and your actions are bringing about change, as well.

Change is happening – and we are all making it so.  In this case, I thank my sister for taking on this task and allowing me to run her race of change beside her, with the purpose of inspiring her to continue to make the world the place she believes it can be.

Train Hard.  Make Change.  Run Strong.

Scott

(Corrie's note: Please consider supporting Interim Place with a donation through Run Strong.  100% of proceeds will go to Interim Place's programs and services for women fleeing violence and their children.  You can make a donation by clicking on the button below or email me at corrie@run-strong.ca if you'd like to donate offline.  Thanks for your support!!)

How I Learned to be Grateful for My Legs

A good friend of mine recently commented that running a marathon is a spiritual experience.  I can imagine that in the agony of those 42 long kilometres, I will need to get acquainted with my spiritual self and, in fact, have had to find inspiration to push on through many of my training runs.

I’d like to share with you one of the great sources of that inspiration.

She’s my daughter, Hannah.

Many of you may know Hannah’s story...and a lot of you were (are!) a key part of the story line.  Hannah was born in August, 2004...19 days ahead of schedule.  People say you forget your labour and delivery the minute you look at your child, but I clearly remember every single moment of it.

Hannah was a beautiful, happy, pudgy, baby with a head full of perfectly formed curls.  I was a neurotic first-time mom...googling every wheezy sound or odd movement she made to ensure that she would survive the next 24 hours.  When Hannah was 3 months old, I started to have a mom’s intuition that something wasn’t quite right.  Many people kindly assured me that not every baby develops according to “What to Expect the First Year”, but Hannah wasn’t making any effort to move toward any of the first-year milestones...sitting up, rolling over, or - later - crawling.  At her 3 month and 6 month Healthy Baby check-ups, I talked to our doctor who felt that it was a factor of Hannah being a big baby and that she would eventually catch up.

When 1 year rolled around and Hannah was making no effort to get on her feet, I stopped accepting the Big Baby Theory and asked for a referral to a pediatrician.  We saw Dr. MacGregor, an amazing pediatrician who patiently listened to all of the diagnoses that I had already made as a result of my exceptional internet research, and then politely suggested that maybe we should let a neurosurgeon do the diagnosing.  Hannah was booked for an MRI and an appointment with Dr. Drake, a neurosurgeon at Sick Kids.

What Dr. MacGregor had discovered in that initial exam was that Hannah’s feet did not bend at the ankles...something was pulling her lower leg muscles in both legs extremely tight, and he hypothesized that it was a neurological issue, related to either her spine or her brain.

Many months, a host of doctors, and a battery of tests later, Hannah was diagnosed with cerebral palsy.  It is a spectrum condition, so some children present mildly and others can face severe challenges.  All we knew at the time was that it was causing Hannah’s legs not to work properly.  She was almost 2 and still not standing on her own.

During the testing and diagnosis period, we had been referred to Erinoak (now ErinoakKids) to begin treatment.  I tried to show everyone what a tough cookie I was during this period of our lives, but when I think of those days of watching Hannah’s little legs put in casts to try and get them to bend in the right position; to her being strapped to a contraption that artificially kept her in the standing position that she couldn’t sustain on her own; to her learning to walk on her knees because she couldn’t bear weight on her legs; and eventually to her little ballerina-decorated leg braces and granny walker that she pushed everywhere she went, I still have to swallow the lump in my throat.  Some of that period is a blur now, but I remember with extreme clarity being told, “We don’t know if she’ll ever walk” and “She will likely never walk without an assistive device” and “She’ll definitely have to wear leg braces until she stops growing.”

The most difficult part of all was that the doctors wanted Hannah’s treatment regimen to include regular Botox injections into the muscles in her legs.  I count the Botox days among my worst as a mom.  We would go into the treatment room, where they would lay Hannah face down across my lap on a little cot and then inject her 5-8 times in each leg while I restrained her.  As you can imagine, she would scream to high heavens, but Hannah’s incredible resilience is one of the reasons she is an amazing gift and, once the injections were over, she would get up, wipe her tears and tell the doctors, “Thank you”.

Hannah took her first steps in October, 2006 at 26 months.  Last year, Hannah ran her first 1 km cross country race without stopping, without assistive devices, and without leg braces.  She no longer needs Botox injections.  I credit the power of prayer, the incredible medical support, the powerful love of our entire family, and her unbreakable spirit for how far she’s come.  In those early days of uncertainty around what Hannah’s future held, so many prayed that she would be able to use those tiny pudgy legs to walk one day and I swore with everything in me that if we were given that gift, I would set an example of never, ever taking our abilities for granted.

That is one of the reasons why, despite not being a natural athlete, I will run for as long as my legs will let me...and that is how I learned to be grateful for my legs.

Thanks for running with me.

We All Need a Little Good News

This past week, I’ve been in a number of situations/conversations that really made me think about the critical importance of self-care and respite from the stresses of our daily lives.  So, this week’s blog is meant to be a few minutes of taking a big deep cathartic breath through your computer screen.

First up: I had a major break through in my training this week.  With the weather being so warm, I’ve been able to get out almost every day.  11 km has become my standard run and by the beginning of April, my goal is to increase that to 16 km.  My breakthrough was the realization that if I double that 16 k, that will be 32 km, just 10 shy of what I need to reach for a full marathon. Now I’m sure that sounded like WAY more of a breakthrough when it happened in my head, but the point is that for the first time, I can tangibly visualize the distance and really see myself getting there.   I’m finishing my 11k feeling strong and, with 200+ days still to go before the race, I am sure I am going to be ready.  

The second thing I wanted to share and, honestly, a good news story that makes me want to burst with excitement every time I think about it, is that my mom has taken up running.  My mom is the epitome of the woman I still hope to be someday: beautiful, active, funny, caring, inspirational, and now a runner.  She went to the Running Room, had an analysis done on her feet, outfitted herself with the right gear and has started running.  To say I’m super proud of her doesn’t even begin to cover it, but I want to give her a huge shout-out for being amazing!!

The last 2 smiles-on-a-computer-screen I’m going to share are in video format.  The first is a video I saw a few months ago on Facebook and it makes me happy (and teary) every time I watch it.  The second is the song I play at the beginning of every one of my runs and I hope it will inspire you the way it inspires me.  I hope you all take good care of yourselves this week…and thanks for running with me.





P.S.  Please consider making a donation to the Run Strong initiative in support of Interim Place by clicking on the button below or if you would like to send a cheque/cash, please email me at corrie@run-strong.ca.